Apr 9, 2009

My own private Madoff

Until recently, the common expectation was that if you did your research, used your head and invested in something, you'd get a return. Times have changed. These days, you think everything through, you take advice, you follow all the rules and do exactly what you're supposed to do, and you get screwed. This is the new world order.

As you've probably gathered from past posts, I'm not entirely thrilled with my job so far. In fact, to be honest, I don't really know why on earth I bother getting up in the morning anymore. But I do. Because that's what I was taught: do the right thing, invest your time, your energy, your heart, your health, your sanity, whatever it takes, and you will eventually reap the rewards.

Really?

I had an interesting conversation with my boss last night. Due to an unfortunate alignment of the stars having to do with ex-boyfriends, ex-cats, new medication, long hours and very rude clients, I ended up breaking apart at the seams in the hallway of the office and getting dragged into a one-hour sob-fest with a well-intentioned partner. And what he told me has given me some real food for thought. In a nutshell, he said it was perfectly normal for me to be feeling miserable in my job. He also said I was unlikely to feel any happier about it... ever. Nonetheless, he recommends that I stick it out for at least another 18 months because "it will all be worth it in the end." Ah yes, the "return on investment" promise.

So what are 18 months of misery worth? How should I price my well-being over that period? And what kind of pay-off would make that investment worth it? Money? Prestige? Pride? Who knows...

Somehow, my life is slowly starting to resemble one of Bartolome's case studies. And that is not a good thing.

2 comments:

N said...

"It's normal to feel miserable in your job"?? Sorry, I don't agree!

gy said...

go to see a movie or meet a friend, it may help you feel better.