Plan B

One day in New York, three smart, beautiful girls were enjoying a bottle or two of Sancerre (or was it Sauvignon Blanc?)  They had been friends for (holy crap) 25 years.  Two were single on a tragic and entertaining scale, one had a good woman waiting for her at home, all were over 30 and worried about passing on their exceptional genetic gifts.

And so this song was born (only one of us is a singer and in this video, the other two are uncredited behind the camera inspiration).

T'as de beaux yeux, tu sais

In honour of Women Are Awesome Month (or whatever it's called) I couldn't resist posting this little jewel which features France's very own, beautiful Marillon Cotillard (she especially has very beautiful ... eyes).

Forehead Tittaes w/ Marion Cotillard from Marion Cotillard

Le Royal with cheese

Photo taken at Munich airport. I couldn't resist.

There are just some days when...

Possibly the best silly news story in living memory.

In fact, it's so good, I have to include a few choice morsels here:

Man Hurt Himself To 'Avoid Work'

Fiscal depute Jim Craigen said: "He was making his way to work and didn't really much fancy going. He therefore removed a razor from his pocket and repeatedly dragged it down his face. He also picked up a boulder and struck it off his head and repeatedly hit himself on the head and body."

And the punchline:

After the case, Reid said: "Looking back, I should have just phoned work and asked them for the day off."

Indeed.

Blogging undercover

I'm packing my survival gear, kissing my loved ones goodbye, and preparing to be parachuted behind enemy lines for BM's (in)famous Operation Brainwashing Training (OBT). And you, dear readers, will have front row, VIP access to it all, in the biggest, scariest undercover blogging operation of all time. Deep Throat, eat your heart out. Assuming I manage to find the energy to post during the only "free" hours (i.e. between 1am and 7am).

Before I leave you, though, I just wanted to share this extremely educational music video, courtesy of a particularly witty friend of mine:

Meet the expert

However, when it comes to improvising a post-surrealist chateau-worthy party outfit on a 3€ budget, my expertise is unrivalled... It's a shame that particular skill isn't more highly valued after graduation.

Is anybody out there?

So recently I began to wonder whether there might not be others out there who had foolishly chosen to do the unthinkable and blog about consulting like - well, like normal people. Curious, I wasted a good hour or two on google and found nothing but self-congratulatory, how-to blogs that preached about the wonderous fun and oodles of cash that come with a job as a consultant. These blogs also typically tended to offer the uninitiated lots of advice about how to land one of these fabulous jobs.

Boring.

And also highly dubious. Most people loathe consultants (almost as much as they loathe lawyers, I'm discovering with dismay). In fact, my former client placed a rather mean-spirited anti-consultant joke (which they had obviously penned themselves, typos and all) right above the coffee machine. The next week we found a dead chicken nailed to the door of our team room.

Ok, I made that up, but the coffee machine joke incident really did happen.

What I'm saying is lots of people have a slightly more, ummm, balanced view of consulting than what I have been able to find on the internet, and that must include people who actually do this for a living.

Now, the reason for my failure to find any interesting, objective "A Day in the Life of a Consultant" blogs may simply be my inadequate research methodology (damn, I knew I should have taken that BM training on "How to Google Like You Mean It.") So, if any of you know of a blog out there that I might enjoy, and that might prove to me that no, I am not alone, there are other consultant bloggers out there that also have the occasional bad day, I sure would appreciate a heads up.

In return, let me share with you these few seconds of much-needed levity:

When I grow up...

Love this cartoon. Many thanks to JMS who provided the link to xkcd.

Serious Politics

I love to talk politics. I could do it all day. Glossing over the fact that I am incredibly ill-informed by employing sly litigator tricks, I can go 15 rounds if need be (and provided I've had enough coffee) to support, defend, humanize, glorify my favourite candidate or - as is more usual - villify my least favourite one. I have spared you all of this, dear readers, as I have made the conscious decision that this blog is not the appropriate forum for an airing of my political opinions/whims-of-the-day.

But this was an opportunity I could not miss, a gem of political debate of the highest order, one that had me floored (as in, rolling around on the floor in laughter). I have newfound respect for Paris Hilton, or whichever clever little person saw the original ad and convinced her to do this. Enjoy.

See more Paris Hilton videos at Funny or Die