I miss my friends.
There was a line on a TV shows I was watching the other day (the world I live in while I'm not living my life) that said something about loneliness at the very bottom of your soul. That's where my loneliness is. Down there. In the muck. At the very bottom of my soul with all the other ugly things.
I know I shouldn't dwell on the negative. Especially not in this blog. Who wants to read about someone else's sadness? "Give us joy!" you cry. "Give us cruel sarcasm! Give us poisonous wit and the odd play on words!"
Oh how I wish I could.
But I need my friends for that. Those incredible women I admire and respect and try my best to channel whenever I have the energy to be a better person. My friends who are far away, with new babies or new boyfriends and not here. Good for them, I say. But God, how it's lonely here without them, when the phone is silent and the inbox empty.
So there is no joy, today. No sarcasm. No wit and no play on words. Just an icky bottom-of-the-soul feeling that won't go away. No matter how much happy yoga tea I drink or TV shows I watch.