Sep 14, 2010

Second best

So the man (Wentworth, to you faithful readers) who left me rather suddenly nine months back because he was "afraid of commitment" (his words, not mine) just announced his engagement.

Add that to the Boy's earnest, heart-warming desire for us to be friends, and sprinkle on top the most recent boyfriend's decision to cancel our romantic weekend to go on holiday with some bikini-clad chick he met in Ibiza, and I'm starting to wonder whether it isn't time to take a good, hard look in the mirror and finally accept that maybe, just maybe, it isn't them.  It's me.

This will be one of those posts that leads concerned friends and family members to wonder whether it's entirely appropriate to be quite this personal on such a public forum.  And my answer to that is, well, it probably isn't.

But if there's a small chance that writing things down will make me feel better about the fact that I keep falling for guys who think I'm just swell but who'd rather be with the leggy blonde, then I'm going to take it.  Writing isn't Harry Potter-esque magic, but it's the closest thing I know to it.  A way to feel the pain and tragedy of humiliating disappointment, have a good moan, and let it go, into the abstract, not-quite-there ether of the internet.

[Pause]

Is it gone yet?

[Longer pause]

Could someone please hurry over with the Nutella?

3 comments:

Houston said...

I will be there in 24 days and counting, Miss Res. And the cocktails we'll have will blow the socks off any Nutella, I guarantee it. Sending you big hugs and kisses.

Anonymous said...

Check out the movie 'Paper Heart'. It doesn't give answer but offer thoughts

Karin B (Looking for Ballast) said...

Ouuuuuch.

I was skimming over past posts, and got to this one.

*sigh*

Just wanted to say that as someone who has been married twice and divorced twice, too, sometimes it is good that those ones pass. Just sayin'. ;-)

You and Nutella hang in there. :)