What I did on my summer holiday

My fans (all two of them) have of late expressed their disappointment at my failure to regularly upload some witty, cutting remarks on the state of consulting, London weather and my fed-up-ness with men. What, you think blog posts grow on trees?! You think it's easy to find some new, clever way to say my job basically consists of writing "leverage" in different colours on slides, it's raining in London (although strangely, not today) and, well, I'm fed up with men?

Well, it's not, OK?! Sometimes, I have writer's block. Like now.

But since the children must be fed their greens, here's "what I did on my summer holiday", in bullet points, à la consultanese:

• I haven't had a summer holiday yet
• I have, however, had a couple weekends away
• First, I went to Lake Garda in Italy (insert schematic representation of lake surrounded by mountains)
• This allowed me to spend some quality time with former INSEAD classmates (insert INSEAD logo and think-cell chart on value of networking)
• They are both consultants too
• One of them jumped in the lake with his blackberry (pause for dramatic effect)
• Last weekend, I went home to the South of France
• I spent two days with family and friends
• I ate well, and slept, and saw the sun
• I was happy (ERROR MESSAGE: Powerpoint is unable to process)
• Next steps...

And in other news, it appears that when faced with the possible end of the world as we know it, Americans vote based on height. Oh good. Nothing to worry about, then.